Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Its been a while..

I can imagine the two boys at home like this when mum makes her salads. But look at mine! It has chicken...and avacado and tomato beneath. Got this idea from the cafe's casear salad sans dressing. And of course, the chicken is the free one from the factory...woo hooo

Anyway, its exams now, with the last paper on the 15th June. Here i am again, temping as the receptionist. I thought i would be able to study here (without falling asleep, without snacking too much, distractions from the internet: scenerio at home). After all, i am at the front desk. But i find myself dozing off, and staring into space.
Just the other day, my lecturer shouted at me in his office when i went to collect my group report. Shouted at me over some dubious information in the report (according to him). And i actually brought him fries! (Because i went to see him after work in school, and i know he regularly buys fries from my work place) In the end, i dumped the fries because he rejected it. He said something like "that won't help."
I AM NOT TRYING TO BRIBE YOU,YOU YOU ERM (i am not very good with vulgar words)
I wanted to cry...because it wasnt my fault the report was dubious. (actually, i DO NOT THINK IT IS DUBIOUS IN THE FIRST PLACE. because it is ALL ALL ALL MY HARD WORK.)
He is just making things difficult, and it aint helping when i had 3 other absolutely useless group mates. I wonder how 2 of them can actually be presidents of some community clubs in university. My gosh! The lecturer said i should have just withdrawn from the group earlier on. Oh well, i had a good heart. I kept giving them chances, hoping they will produce substantial work, or the very least even PRODUCE SOMETHING. I ended up being a nagger and possibly the bitch.

Well, for that report, i failed by an amazing 0.5. Not sure if i should be grateful or not. I hope this doesnt happen in the exams.
I used to be very nice to people, then became not so nice because i feel i am taken for granted and not appreciated and ALWAYS BACK STABBED. But somehow, i am finding the niceness and the "thinking for other people" back again. The other day, i packed my friend her favourite nuts and brought another friend her craved cookies and cream ice cream. That's good right, because i thought i had become very self centered. I should be even MORE selfless, that's the aim.
And you know, i wouldnt have brought fries for that lecturer if i wasn't you know...thinking of him. I knew the marks have been set, why will i want to bribe him! Besides, i am not one who begs. Back in secondary school, everyone used to bug the teachers for more marks every time the test gets returned. And i wouldnt even bother, just sit there and watch them go by.
And you know how i ALWAYS fail my physics, interestingly...i remember i failed my physics final exam by 5 marks. And i didnt bother to go beg for marks, even though classmates who scored 80,90,95 went to squeeze just another 0.5 or so. My physics teacher ACTUALLY CAME UP TO ME and asked me to see him after school. I thought i was in trouble. I went after school, he took my paper and started giving me marks!! Come to think of it, why fail me when you are going to give me free marks later?!
Maybe he just wants some "private time" with me. Hahahahaa
This friday night, the boyfriend is working...yeeeeah...means i dont need to cook dinner (now i can understand why mummy is so frustrated with cooking everyday), means i can make curry puff, play majong and have a girl's night out (someone rented some gay comedy, we intend to order pizza and watch together). And erm..of course, study.

2 comments:

Shyanne Browning said...

you've always been the nice thoughtful friend to me. and i love you for it.

Anonymous said...

We had been watching a tv show called 'e tau' a korean show about a doctor's journey to being the most reputed chinese doctor in Korea. He was also taken advantage of, he works but his group mates do not do their share. Sounds like what u r going through. In his case, we knew the ending.We are sure too that ur ending will be like him - it will be worth all the pain, frustrations and misunderstandings...mnd